Mixed Up
by deecie
Summary: What if Sadie won Instant Star instead of Jude? Eventually a JT..please R&R! Rating will eventually be up to T!
1. Chapter 1

A/N – Okay, so this is my first fanfic in like…6 months! So please when you R&R give me feedback, I'd really appreciate it!

Oh and I don't own Instant Star or anything to do w/ it, this story is just mine.

Oh yeah, I'll be using "So Yesterday" by Hilary Duff, and Waiting by Greenday, and 24 Hours…

I couldn't believe Georgia had picked who she did. ANOTHER blonde pop-princess who was addicted to Boyz Attack? As if I hadn't had enough of that back in the 90's. So when she brought Sadie in, I nearly choked. I'm pretty sure I told her that this WASN'T what I wanted to work with…

" Sadie Harrison, meet your producer Tom Quincy", it was like the sky was falling. But I put on a fake smile and pretended to be into meeting her.

"Omigod! YOU"RE LITTLE TOMMY Q!"

Geez, girlie, really? I hadn't realized who I was in the past 22 years.

" Don't you EVER let me hear you call me Little Tommy Q again… I'm either Tommy or Tom. So uh…Sadie, right? Like…Sexy Sadie?", I asked her.

"Yeah, that's me…my dad's a big Beatles fan.."

"Kinda figured by your name. So uh, tell me about yourself"

"Well, I'm 18 and I've been singing since like, before I can remember…even before Boyz Attack!"

I rolled my eyes. Here we go, this was gonna be fun.

"So Sadie…why don't you show me what you got" I asked her. She handed me a CD and she walked into the studio and…hold on, did she just WINK at me? I can't believe that she WINKED AT ME… I can already tell producing this girls CD was gonna suck…wait…what's that screeching! Woah…That's SADIE? I need to have a serious talk with Georgia…

"Uh, Sadie can you stop, 'cuz you're hurting my ears" I bellowed. I didn't care if she looked hurt, I walked out of the studio and found Georgia.

"G, I can't work with this…she has no voice to work with!"

"Look Tom, She was the best there was, so work with her as best you can"

"Georgia, you're not telling me that she was the best you could find"

"She was Tom…trust me. Please work with her, you know G-Major needs a star"

"Georgia I can't make somebody into a star who has no talent!"

"MAKE IT WORK TOMMY! I'm serious!"

I glared at her and walked out of the room.

"Look Sadie, why don't we call it a day, you just want to hang out and work on lyrics today or something?" She squeeled so loudly I thought that she was going to wet her pants.

"Okay uhm…Tommy **(giggle) **I'd love to! Why don't we just go back to my house!"

This is sure gonna be….interesting. So Sadie and I just walked to the parking lot and she nearly fell into the viper she was so excited. She directed me to her house, and practically dragged me inside.

"Where're your parents?"

Her smile faltered.

"They're um… at marriage counseling"

I felt bad all of a sudden and I noticed she looked away from me, as if she were embarrassed.

"Hey, my parents had problems all the time" , I put my finger under her chin and lifted her head to look at me. "Thing's will work out"

She smiled tightly and turned away.

"So um, anyway, you wanted to work on lyrics or something?"

"Yeah, so let's see what you've got"

I took her diary and started to read the lyrics to myself…and they were kind of…okay? I was surprised.

_Any moment everything can change_

_Feel the wind on your shoulder_

_For a minute all the world can wait_

_Let go of your yesterday_

_Can you hear it calling?_

_Can you feel it in your soul?_

_Can you trust this longing and take control?_

_CHORUS_

_Fly_

_Open up the part of you that wants to hide away_

_You can shine_

_Forget about the reasons why you can _

_deny and start to try 'cus it's your time, time to fly_

--

I was getting into it when I heard somebody else singing…somebody who was definitely not Sadie and… and she was amazing… whoever she was the girl could really belt. I guess I looked pretty amazed…because then Sadie told me it was her younger sister Jude. Wow I guess their dad really did like The Beatles, huh?

I kept listening to her.

_I can't have anything I want!_

_They say I'm just to young but it's not my fault_

_I'll find my own way home if I gotta_

_I'll make it all alone if I gotta…._

I closed my eyes and listened. I could felt the waves of frustration radiating out of Sadie…and I could feel the way Jude was fed up with the way people were treating her.

"Did she write that?", I asked Sadie. She shrugged and rolled her eyes.

"Can we get back to this?"

"Yeah um, sure…"

Just as I moved a bit closer to Sadie to get the book back which she had been writing it she turned and kissed me. She was cute but she's my artist, so I pulled back and was about to yell at her when--

"Jeez, Sadie, you THINK you could take other people into consideration before you bring home your latest boy toy without telling anybody?" I heard someone say exasperatedly behind us. I whipped around and saw a girl with flaming red hair, a rancid shirt, acid washed and ripped jean mini-skirt with knee length leggings, and combat boots with a guitar in her right hand standing there.

"Jude, why don't you just go join your local mosh pit or whatever it is you do" Sadie snipped. I raised an eyebrow…these two girls were sisters?

"Yeah I'll go do that Sadie when you go to the mall and somehow buy yourself some talent" I couldn't help but smile.

"Tommy, that wasn't funny!" I didn't laugh!

"Tommy…Little Tommy Q! I knew I recognized you. Sadie, it looks like you might actually have some kinda taste!"

"Jude, get out of the house or go upstairs, just stop bugging me."

"Gladly."

She started walking out when she turned back and frowned.

"By the way Tommy Q. , where's your bandana?"

My mouth opened and closed like a goldfish in shock….what'd I do to her?

She laughed and flipped her bright red hair, and walked out of the ho use.

"God, isn't she just like a total drag"

"No…just angsty. How old is she?"

"Sixteen…gosh she's such a freak!"

"I kinda liked her"

"What?"

"Could I talk to her sometime?"

"Tommy, she's sixteen!"

"Yeah…with a great voice!"

"Why don't you just leave?"

"See you at the studio tomorrow at 10"

I walked out of the house and saw Jude next door playing her guitar and singing the song she was singing earlier.

" _I'm not so trustful with my friends_

_I'm on the road alone again_

_I guess I'm tired of giving in…_

_I'm sick of wishin' you were near_

_You've gone away you've made it clear…_

Why do I feel you every-" 

She stopped suddenly.

"Tommy Q, what do you want?"

" To have you record that song"

"Yeah right…" She rolled her eyes.

"I'm serious" I got out a G-Major business card and wrote my number on the back. I handed it to her.

"If you want to, give me a call"

Her mouth dropped, and smiled and walked away

I heard her start a Greenday song and stopped for a split second.

"_I've been, _

_waiting a lifetime for this _

_moment to come, I'm destined for anything at all…!"_

I turned back and we smiled at each other.

"Call me sometime" , and I turned away again, and smiled even more.

Because right then I knew…

We'd finally found an Instant Star.


	2. Chapter 2

Blah blah I don't own Instant Star or anything affiliated with it

But I wish I diddd!

Okay I know that this chapter is really short, but bear with me….

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Okay. So it's been what? Two weeks and I still haven't called Tommy back. I know I should but…he's TOMMY Q from BOYZ ATTACK? How am I supposed to take him seriously? Especially if he's producing somebody like SADIE? I guess I should called him sooner, before he came and found me.

So I'm falling asleep in Algebra right? When all of a sudden the door opens and all the girls in my class start screaming, which you know…wakes me up!

So I look up and there's Little Tommy Q, looking really REALLY uncomfortable. I couldn't help it…I started laughing.

"Um Ms.." Tommy looked at my teacher and I seriously thought she was going to pee in her pants.

" Johnson! What can I do for Mr…Quincy" and she giggled. My old hag of a math teacher giggled. I felt my mouth drop to my desk.

" Yeah so Ms. Johnson, can I talk to Jude really quickly?"

"Yes yes! By all means"

In the meantime, I had very artfully attempted to hide behind my math book, which really didn't work because Tommy came up to my desk and dragged me out of the room. I thought the girls in my class would kill me.

Once we got outside the room, he got straight down to business.

"Why haven't you called? I thought you wanted to record"

"Oh well… I dunno, I'm kind of failing math right now so my parents have um--"

"Yeah okay, you've been avoiding me"

"What? No I--"

"OH please, you're easier to read than a first grade book. So when will you come in and record?"

"Look Tommy-"

"Jude, you have to understand. You're the real thing, girl. You have to record your songs."

"But Sadie—things are already bad at home"

I looked away, and he seemed to look at me more closely.

" I don't want to lose the one person in my family that I can talk to, too hate me Tommy"

"Jude…I can see it in you, this is your dream"

"I know it is….but Sadie won this time, just like she always does. She won the contest, why're you chasing after me?"

"Well…between you and me, you actually have talent"

"Very funny" I was being sarcastic, but I admit, he did make me smile right then.

" Look, at least let me show you what you're missing. Tonight, why don't we just hang out. We'll go for dinner and work on some of your songs"

Okay, so here's where I got confused. Lil' Tommy Q was asking me out…wasn't he?

" I don't know Tommy…"

"Jude, you have to. I'm picking you up at 7, be ready"

"But!-"

He smiled and put on his sunglasses.

"Uh-uh-uh! Get back to what was it? Basic Math?"

"HEY! It's Algebra and I'm trying okay!"

He laughed at me and walked away; I opened my mouth to say something, then just went back to class.

Tommy's POV

So, I went to Jude's school knowing that she couldn't run from me there. But when I kind of asked her out, I'll admit I shocked myself. She's sixteen after all but… I hate to admit but even though I barely knew her she was getting to me. A sixteen year old who didn't treat me like Lil' Tommy Q who totally got---wait a second…

I like JUDE? Of all people, and somebody I've talked to what…twice. Somebody who's SIX YEARS YOUNGER THAN ME? And I asked her out on a date tonight. Maybe she won't think it's a date….because if she thinks it's a date…and I like her and I think it's a date…but she's SIXTEEN…

Oh tonight's going to be interesting. Very, very interesting….


	3. Chapter 3

So I don't own Instant Star or anything affiliated with it, blah blah blah.

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After school was out Jude ran home, but not after calling Kat and having her come over to help put an outfit together. Sure, she was into punk rock, but tonight she wanted to be a little more girly, this was a date, right? After two hours, a major makeup job, hair curling, and extremely cute outfit had been put together, Jude thought she looked ready. She wore a Kat design, a dark green corset halter with black pants, and a black blazer to go on top.

"Kat, I actually really like this. This is awesome."

"What's awesome is Tommy Q asking you out!"

"KAT KEEP IT DOWN! If Sadie finds out about this, she'll flip a shit!"

"Wait…you're telling me you didn't tell her you were hanging out with her producer tonight"

"Umm..well.. sorta…kinda….well yeah it's exactly what I'm saying." Jude blushed and looked ashamed. " I should have, right?"

"You SHOULD HAVE told her! What if she finds out about this!"

"She won't! I have a whole plan. I'm gonna tell her that me and you are putting together some stuff for your show"

"Jude…I don't mind being your cover. But didn't you say Tommy has this amazingly hot car that's like…impossible to miss?"

"Omigod Kat…I totally forgot! What's the time!"

"Um…6:35"

Jude whipped out her phone and called Tommy.

"What!"

"Oh um…hi Tommy…" Tommy sighed with relief. Kwest had been calling him nonstop about having to work on Sadie's tracks. He didn't get why nobody else understood why he was so unenthusiastic…had anybody else listen to Sadie sing lately? But when he found out it was Jude he felt a warm feeling spread in his chest.

"Hey, Jude" He laughed. For some reason he knew that she would—

"Spare me they Hey, Jude HAHAHA. I just wanted to tell you to park around the block, and I'll meet you at 7:05, okay?"

"Secretive, much?"

"Look, you suckered me into this, and the last thing I want is for Princess Sadie to know about this! She'll just throw a freakin bitch--"

"Jude! I need you down here" Mrs. Harrison called for her second daughter. The two needed to have a serious talk.

"Hold on Mom!"

"NOW!"

Jude panicked and hissed" Look just around the block at 7:05" and hung up.

Tommy was smiling at the other end. Something about meeting her so privately was very appealing to him. He had to keep telling himself that she's sixteen, and out of bounds. He checked himself in the mirror.

"I guess this okay" he muttered under his breath. He took in his reflection, his hair messed up in the usual Tom Quincy fashion, a black shirt with jeans, and his leather jacket. He picked up his keys and left for his car.

In the meantime, Jude was having other problems beside how she looked. While Kat stood to the side Jude was getting yet another lecture from her mother.

"Jude Harrison! How could you not think to tell me about failing another math test?"

"Mom! It's not my fault, I swear that he's out to get me!"

"I'm sure the whole world is out to get you Jude!"

"Well then I'm sorry I'm so stupid!"

"Jude, honey, you aren't stupid you just aren't motivated in school! What will it take to get you to pass a math test once in a while!"

"Okay Mom, look Kat and I really have to work on this, the show is in less than a month!"

"Fine, but it's to Kat's and back, nowhere else."

"Oh we're going to be working at her studio in the city, but mom I PROMISE to be back before 11:30"

"If you're not home by then I'm coming to get you"

"No need mom, I promise"

Kat and Jude ran out of her house and looked at her phone. It was 7:08.

"Kat I'm really sorry that I have to--"

Kat yelled after Jude as she ran.

"YOU"RE LATE, RUN! You look hot and you'll do great I want details afterwards!"

Jude turned around the corner to see a very handsome Tom Quincy leaning on the hood of his car waiting for her.

"Hey! I'm so sorry I'm late my mom found out about my latest math disaster and--"

But Tommy wasn't listening. He couldn't stop looking at her. She looked gorgeous.

_It should be illegal for girls under 18 to wear clothing that makes them look so …. There's no other word than hot. _He thought to himself.

"Earth to Tommy! Where're we goin'?"

"Oh sorry, girl. Zoned out for a minute…hmm how's Italian sound to you?"

Jude smiled and turned to put on her seatbelt.

"Italians fine"

She turned back to Tommy as he started the car and the stereo started blaring…really bad music.

"Jesus what the hell is that crap?" Jude hollered over the… "music"

"Welcome to having to listen to your sister sing everyday" Tommy smiled at the look of horror on Jude's face. "Not your idea of good stuff? I was getting kind of used to it!"

"Oh my god Tommy I would rather listen to a dying camel than listen to that"

" I figured you'd say something like that." He turned it off and put on The Clash. Jude smiled.

"This is more like it!"

" But, now you see why you need to go into the studio?"

"Um…To show that some people don't have to shriek to get fans?"

" Well… partly yeah. But girl, you have it. You've got the talent and the drive. I can feel it"

He turned to her and smiled. Jude blushed and turned away.

_Man, I never thought I'd think somebody like Lil' Tommy Q was so damn…hot. _She thought to herself. She noticed the awkward silence and spoke up.

"So, how long have you been producing?"

"Three or four years now… ever since the big split of Boyz Attack. How long have you been singing and songwriting?"

" Oh I don't even remember how long I've been singing. But I picked up my first acoustic when I was 6…and I remember for the first time in my life not feeling like such a freak. With a sister like Sadie…how could I not feel like a freak? I love her but…she's got such an addiction to being this gorgeous, perfect, smart, winning chick…. you know?"

By now they had arrived at the restaurant and were making their way inside.

"Yeah…so you two aren't close?" Tommy replied softly. He knew Sadie was crazy , but in order to make a six year old feel that inferior something had to be wrong.

"Not really…I don't think we've had a real conversation since I was like…15"

Tommy's head snapped. This whole time, he realized, he had been getting to know a girl who was six year younger than him, who he wanted to work with. How could he have feelings for her? She didn't even seem to reciprocate them. Sure she seemed interested and it seemed like she liked talking to him but he couldn't take away her innocence….

While Tommy was having all the thoughts he was having, Jude was freaking out.

Okay, why is Tommy Q so interested in me? He can't LIKE me… can he? Why would he like somebody like me when there's girls like Sadie all over him. I'm just not even gonna give this a shot. I'll record with him, but that's it, I can't get involved that'd be so wrong…and he's like what 6 years older than me? And he was in Boyz Attack, um EW. Why couldn't he be somebody like Billie Joe or something?

Jude was having all these thoughts while Tommy and her were being seated. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror that was up for decoration…she looked decent.

They sat down, got their drinks (Shirley Temple's for both…) Talked about music, and got their menus. Tommy couldn't help but notice every time she smiled or laughed he fell for her harder and harder for her. _ How can she make me feel this way, just being herself? She's not even trying to do anything…"_

Jude was having a really hard time.

" You okay, Jude?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah" She looked up and smiled sheepishly, "I'm trying to figure out which will be the biggest, but least expensive dish"

Tommy raised his eyebrow at the skinny girl.

"You eat a lot?"

Jude looked up alarmingly.

"Do I eat a lot? As if that weren't the understatement of the century. Eating is like…my middle name"

Tommy laughed and felt himself blush. _I'm blushing because of a sixteen year old. What the hell is wrong with-- woah she just bent down and I could see down her shirt. But she's sixteen that shouldn't turn me on or anything and…now she's saying she has to go to the bathroom and SHE JUST KISSED ME ON THE CHEEK. Oh man, this isn't even her fault. She probably doesn't even know what she's doing to me…but how can she be sixteen? She knows more than half of the 20 year olds I know…man I'm falling harder than I thought…" _

Jude noticed that Tommy was getting a dreamy look on his face, with this dopey smile, so she quickly excused herself, kissed him on the check and went to the bathroom. She still looked good, so she quickly went to the bathroom, fixed her makeup quickly, and was on her way back to their table when she saw her father. She was about to say hi, but figured it'd be best not to disrupt her parents.

_That's funny…_she thought to herself…_ I don't remember Mom saying that her and dad were going out…_

She hid behind a plant, and when the woman turned around her eyes widened. _ That's not mom…_

The woman turned back and got her purse. Her dad got up as well…the woman smiled as Jude's father put her coat on for her. _ It's probably just business_…

All those thoughts of Jude's were shattered when the woman turned to her father and kissed him on the lips and hardly…and her father wasn't hesitating, if anything he was pulling her in for more. The one man Jude idolized beyond belief who she believed would always be there for her family was with another woman, and kissing her! Tears stung Jude's vision as she made her way back to the table.

Tommy looked up at Jude and noticed she was crying.

"Jude, what's wrong?" His voice suddenly became very soft and tender…more than he had ever heard it anyway.

Jude's voice was barely over a whisper.

"Tommy, can we go back to your place?" Tommy's eyes widened and he looked unsure. In public he could restrain himself from hugging her and kissing her but in his home? In private?

"Please, Tommy…I just need to talk to somebody about this…"

Suddenly he felt queasy. She didn't get her period for the first time or something, did she? That would totally ruin the night. He looked even more unsure at her as she cried as quietly as anybody could.

She crouched down and leaned forward pulling him into a hug he didn't resist, and pleaded softly in his ear while she was still crying.

"Please Tommy, I need to talk to somebody, I don't know what to do"

"Jude, what's going on?" he pulled away from her, their faces only inches apart. The restaurant blended into the daze of a background…nobody was there for that moment for him except for him Jude. It all came crashing to an end when she told him.

"Please Tommy can you take me back to your place to talk…I think my father's having an affair"


	4. Chapter 4

"Who in the hell does he think he is?" Jude fumed as she stepped inside Tom Quincy's house. She didn't even stop to look around at the decor.

The ride to his house was silent and fast. Tommy was unsure of what to do, he'd seen people high, drunk, angry, sad…but not with the actions of each mixed into one. He had a feeling he'd have to hide the fragile things in his home.

"Jude, I'm sure there's an explan--"

"EXPLINATION? Tommy! I just saw my father kiss---kiss---" She couldn't even finish her sentence. Tommy's heart broke as he watch the sixteen year old crumble to the floor sobbing hysterically.

He crouched down next to her and took her in his arms and rocked her back and forth.

"Shhh, I'll help you, we'll figure something out"

"Tommy, my dad…my DAD…how could he? How could he do this to me? To Sadie… to my MOM…oh God , Tommy how am I going to tell my mom!"

Tommy pulled her closer as she sobbed into his chest, stroking her hair. He pulled away slightly when the sobbing subsided a bit and looked down at her face. Her makeup was running down her cheeks and her eyes… _those eyes_ he thought _how could anybody cause so much pain in those gorgeous eyes_.

Suddenly Jude looked faint and pale. She put her hand to her head and pushed her hair back and looked up at Tommy.

" I need a drink"

"A—what? You're sixteen"

"Thank you for the math lesson." She rolled her eyes. " Well seeing as how I doubt you're going to give me anything alcoholic, do you have any soda?"

"Yeah…hold on" Tommy kept his eyes on her as he walked away. _She drinks?_

Jude sat on the floor of Tommy's apartment and looked around. He truly did live the life of a rock…well, popstar. She slightly smiled but it vanished as soon as she remembered why she asked him to bring her here. She heard a noise at the door and looked up and saw Tommy coming toward her with a soda. He handed it to her and sat down beside her. They sat in silence for a few minutes.

"So…what are you going to do?" He asked softly. She looked up her eyes still red from the crying…and it looked like she was on the verge of tears again.

She looked down at her coke and he watched her as tears fell.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do…I have to tell my mom… and…and how? How can I tell her something like this?"

Tommy put his hand on her arm. "You'll figure something out " _She doesn't deserve this,_ he thought.

"Sadie had been telling me about your mom and dad fighting…"

Jude sighed. "They've been fighting for years, but I never thought he'd have a…." Jude's voice got softer "…a mistress" The tears started flowing again and Tommy pulled her close.

After some time she stopped crying, but stayed in Tommy's arms. She didn't want him to let go….ever. _I've fallen for Tommy Q, _Jude thought to herself.

Jude pulled away slightly and looked up into Tommy's eyes. _They really are ice blue_. Tommy looked down at Jude at let out a shuddering breath….he didn't know if he could handle being so close to her. _This is it, _he thought, _I'm just going to kiss I'm going to throw caution to the wind and—_too late.

Before he knew what was happening Jude had leaned up and kissed Tommy firmly on the lips. She pulled away quickly looking down.

"I'm sorry, I mean I shouldn't have I mean you're Sadie's producer and and---um… well" Tommy smiled at the way she was stammering.

He put his index finger under her chin and pushed her face lightly to look up. She looked at him, with her eyes wide and slightly doubtful. Before she knew it, Tommy pulled her face to his and kissed her lightly, his hands on her face. After a minute or so the two broke apart and looked down and up at each other. This time, they both went for it. Nothing mattered right now except them. Tommy's hands were on Jude's lower back, and hers were around his neck. _So this is what it's like to kiss little Tommy Q…_ she smiled as she kissed him. She moved her hands down his back and tugged at the hem of his shirt. Tommy had already made his way to the front of Jude's shirt and was slowly making his way up to her chest. Things were getting heated. Tommy was on top of Jude, kissing her neck as she ran her hands all over his body. _She's such a great kisser,_ he thought to himself, _I can't believe that she's sixteen…_ All of a sudden Tommy's brain snapped and he pulled away from Jude, reluctantly, but quickly.

"What's wrong?" she asked

"Damnit Jude! You're sixteen! I was trying to get you to record with me, not make out with me!"

"Are you kidding me! You've been checking me out all night! Don't even blame this one me!"

"I didn't mean it like that!"

"Then what did you mean Tommy? Are you going to sit here and tell me that you didn't like what we just did?"

Tommy took a deep breath. He was treading on thin ice right now…he wanted Jude, oh man did he want Jude…but he didn't want to complicate things.

"I loved what we just did Jude but…but how can I be with you? I want you to sign with G-Major,I think your music needs to be heard, I want to produce your music, and provide you with all the resources you could ever want to be a star!"

"Is that what this whole thing was about Tommy? Getting me to record? Is this how you get ALL of those other girls to record? Huh, Tommy? Take them out to a nice dinner, console them when something goes terribly wrong, makeout with them, and tell them it's because you want them…TO RECORD? You know what? Screw you Little Tommy Q. I don't want to fucking record my music with a scumbag like you."

Tommy's eyes widened. He knew what just happened was wrong, but he didn't expect her to take it this far.

"Jude, listen to me!"

"No, Lil' Tommy Q! YOU listen to ME! I thought we had something tonight! I thought maybe, just MAYBE I could be wrong about you. But you turned out to be exactly who I thought you were!" Tears were once again stinging Jude's eyes and blurring her vision, "Is this because of Sadie, because you want your studio relationship to be okay?"

Tommy looked away. In all honesty deep down he knew it was because of that. He knew that he couldn't have bad blood between Sadie and him.

"Yeah, I guess" For some reason, Jude calmed down, but continued to cry.

"You couldn't have just said that? If you didn't want me at all Tommy you could have just said you wanted me just to record. Nobody forced you to kiss me back Tommy…." Then she said something so quietly Tommy couldn't even hear.

"What did you say?"

Jude looked up awkwardly and looked away.

"Nothing. It's just….this is so stupid. You want to know why I'm upset, or…more upset?"

"…Why?" He tried to look at her but she refused to look up. Her gaze was fixed on the ground.

"Because Tommy…you just gave me my first real kiss. Ever. And now you want to take it back.". She had looked up at him, but her gaze faltered and she looked down at the ground. _Her first real kiss? How is that possible! She was phenomenal! _, Tommy thought to himself trying to get his jaw to close from the shock.

"You know what? I have to get going. I have to be home in… well I have to be home now. Bye Tommy"

She turned quickly and left a dumbstruck Tommy planted at his spot.

"Jude?" he called after her weakly. She whipped around, her eyes puffy and red, the makeup still on her face.

"I'm sorry" he looked away.

Jude looked straight at him and walked two steps closer.

"You didn't know. When can I come?"

"What?"

"In to the studio. I think I have a couple things I want to record."

"How about Friday night? Nobody's in the studio then, it'll just be me and you and Kwest…the tech guy who I work with"

Jude turned and opened the door.

"Are you gonna be there?" Tommy asked.

Jude turned around and took a deep breath.

"I think after I tell my mom about my dad I'll definitely need to get away….Tommy?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for tonight…I'm sorry it ended in disaster but…thank you."

She moved closer to Tommy and gave him a hug and pulled away and looked down. She couldn't look up into those eyes…she knew she wouldn't be able to hold back.

She opened the door and walked out.

She took a cab home and stood outside her front door. She looked at her watch "11:45" it read.

Jude sighed and tears blinded her vision again. _God Mom,_ she thought to herself, _I'm sorry I have to tell you…but you just have to know. _ Jude took a deep breath and put her hand on the front door and turned the knob. Reality lay ahead for her…a reality she didn't want to be a part of.


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry for the lack of updating…I've just been super busy. **

**I don't own Instant Star blah blah blah. Or any of the songs I use, if I do own them I'll uh..put in an A/N before it.**

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Jude took a deep breath, put her hand on the doorknob of her house and walked inside. She looked to her left to see her dad and mom going at it on the couch. Victoria snapped up when she heard someone come in.

"Jude! Honey….you're late! How was Kat's? I thought you were uh staying there…"

She couldn't even formulate words….how could she tell her mother that the man she was about to have sex with (again) was having an affair? She decided to keep her mouth shut.

"This is disgusting, I have school tomorrow….I'm going to bed" Jude said slowly putting her hand in front of her eyes.

"Jude, honey--"

"No, no keep on getting on whatever it is you're umm…getting on"

She ran upstairs to her room, closed the door and fell onto her bed, crying herself to sleep.

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The week went by slowly for everybody. Every time Jude was going to tell her mother about her father's affair she punked out. She couldn't forget the events of Friday night. On Saturday she woke up feeling guilty, but on Sunday she felt so sick to her stomach thinking of what her father had been doing that she did get sick. She couldn't help but feel guilty…but she thought that maybe Friday at the studio could clear her head. She was playing around with her guitar on Wednesday night when Sadie walked into her room.

" Jude….I need your help"

Jude looked from her bed and gave Sadie a tired look…she hadn't slept in days, and it was obvious.

"What's up Sade?"

"I have lyrics to a song….and I want you to help me come up with the music"

Jude's eyes widened…looking into Sadie's eyes. She knew that her sister really was trying, and that her voice had gotten somewhat better because Georgia had signed her up for singing lessons.

"Sure Sades, lemme see the lyrics"

Sadie handed over the lyrics and watched Jude's reaction. Nobody spoke, for about 5 minutes.

"Sadie…these lyrics are great!"

"Thanks, Jude"

"I know exactly what music we could put them with" She looked up and smiled at her sister and her sister smiled back.

"Then little sister, let's get to work"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sadie didn't go to the studio on Thursday and it was almost a relief for Tommy. He couldn't wait to see Jude the next day…he couldn't wait to hear what she was working on. It had been a slow day, he'd been working with some artists when Kwest came in to talk to him.

"Yo, man I think that tomorrow I'm gonna take the night off"

Tommy didn't look up from the sound board.

"No you aren't"

"What? Man, I haven't had a night off in weeks"

"I know, but I got this girl comin' in tomorrow night, you gotta hear her. Amazing doesn't even begin to cut it"

"You serious?"

"No, I'm totally bullshiting you because of course I want to waste my Friday night hanging out with you" Tommy looked up at Kwest, smiled and rolled his eyes, "_Yes_, I'm serious man!"

"Alright you got me…but this girl better be good"

Kwest walked back and Tommy went back to mixing on the soundboard. He noticed something but tried to shrug it off…but he couldn't fool Kwest. Kwest walked out of Studio B and looked in at the smile Tommy had on his face.

"I hope for the sake of this girl that she can resist the charms of Lil' Tommy Q"

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The school day dragged for Jude. Nothing interesting happened. It was last period, and she was already trying to figure out what she would wear to the studio that night. She zoned out of Biology and started daydreaming about Tommy Q until someone slightly nudged her causing her to fall out of her desk.

"Ms. Harrison, is everything all right back there? I hope your nap wasn't disturbed" the bio teacher sneered.

"No, ma'am. And I wasn't sleeping…"

"Yes dear, you keep telling that to yourself to make excuses as to why you'll fail your next test"

Jude was about to reply when the teacher started teaching again.

She turned to her right.

"Vincent, what in the hell is wrong with you!" She hissed

"Sorry Harrison, it looked like you were about to drool all over your binder"

"Shut up, I was not"

"So you free tonight? 'Cuz I was thinkin' maybe we could you know…._jam_" Spiederman's voice dropped to a whisper as his hand made it's way to her knee. Jude blushed and looked away. Things with Speed had been on and off for months. As much as they hung out, Speed never kissed her, though. She wasn't sure if she wanted to waste her time. She turned back and looked up at him. She knew that she was hanging out with Tom Quincy later that night , and she knew that she liked Quincy a lot. But she couldn't help but give in to Speed.

"How about right after school?"

"Yeah, my basement?"

"Sure…why don't we just walk?"

"Good plan"

"Whatever fliriting you two are doing back there I hope it'll help you pass your next test which is on Tuesday" the teacher yelled back to them.

Jude and Speed stopped talking but she noticed something. His hand was still on her knee….

The day finally ended and the two walked back to Speed's house, joking and laughing the whole time.

"You hungry, Harrison?"

" I think the better question is when am I not hungry?"

Speed looked up and smiled at her and shook his head.

"Good thing you have a fast metabolism Harrison, or I swear you'd weight about 400 pounds"

"Funny"

"Get a plate? They're right behind you"

Speed made nachos while Jude talked about some new songs she was thinking about.

"So yeah, it's totally awesome I'm really starting to get over the fact that I didn't make it past the first round in Instant Star"

Speed smiled. "I'm really happy for you, Jude"

She frowned. "What, you're not being you right now, what's up?"

"Uh, (cough) nothing, wanna work on a song?"

"Actually….yeah"

The two made their way down to the basement and Jude picked up Speed's acoustic guitar. He watched her and she looked up.

"What?"

"Play, duh"

She smiled, turned around took a deep breath, then turned back. She sat down on the musty green couch and looked up at Speed.

"I just wrote this like….on Tuesday so don't totally trash it, okay?"

"Jude, you know I couldn't trash your stuff, now play before the end of today?"

"Okay, here we go"

Speed watched as Jude sang softly, but powerfully….

_I, started it out, on the wrong foot_

_Now I'm not myself… _

_I am Jekyll, I am Hyde_

_Found this place to hide_

_Come seek me_

_Oh, so up and down _

_So back and forth _

_So insecure…_

_Can't get this taste out of my mouth _

_Swallow it down, pretend…_

_Hold it, hold it all in _

_Let it build up, oh build a bomb_

_And blow it, blow it away, _

_Clear it all out just end it_

_I'm just a normal person_

_Without those problems, _

_When did it change? _

_Admissions so embarrassing, _

_I'm on the verge of tears again_

_Hold it, hold it all in _

_Let it build up, oh build a bomb_

_And blow it, blow it away, _

_Clear it all out just end it…._

Spiederman looked at Jude with awe. What was this song about? She always had some kind of meaning to her songs. She looked up after she finished the last chorus. He noticed that tears were streaming down her face. She quickly tried to brush them away but he still saw.

"Jude…" he spoke so softly, "What was that song about"

He got up and sat on the coffee table across from her, holding her hands, his forhead pressed against hers.

"It's about…It's a-about" She stammered then took a deep breath and looked up. "It's about my dad…it's not done yet or anything"

He moved next to her. "What happened with your dad?"

She looked away and said in a barely audible whisper as tears continued to go down her cheeks. "He's having an affair"

Spiederman opened his eyes as if he were seeing Jude for the first time since he'd met her in the 3rd grade. This girl had more secrets than he could imagine.

"Oh, Speed" She turned to him and pulled him into a hug. He didn't resist, and when she pulled away from him, he finally did what he'd been meaning to do for months now…he kissed her. He was surprised, she actually kissed him back. He moved his hands around her back and she slid backwards on the coach as he moved on top her, when all of a sudden her phone rang.

"Don't pick it up" he murmured between kisses.

"I have to, it could be To-"

Jude froze and pulled away from Speed. What was she doing? She was acting like…like SADIE! She looked at her watch and back up at Speiderman. She saw the very confused look on his face. She smiled….maybe she wasn't being a tramp like Sadie…she really did like Speiderman. She moved closer and gave him a quick kiss. Her phone continued to ring, but eventually stopped.

"I have to go, but I'll talk to you later okay?"

He kissed her again.

"Okay"

Jude looked at her watch again. 4:45. She had a half hour to get to the studio…but somehow she wasn't as excited to go there as she had felt with Vince Spiederman minutes before.

Tommy had been giddy all day. He sent Sadie home early after asking her thousands of times how Jude was. She eventually got sick of him asking and took it as an opportunity to leave…not that he minded.

It was 5:05 and Jude ran into G-Major.

"Tommy?" she called out. "Great…I show up and nobody's even here" She looked around at the empty office sighed and plopped down on one of the coaches. She opened her guitar case and started playing the song she was singing earlier.

_I, started it out, on the wrong foot_

_Now I'm not myself… _

_I am Jekyll, I am Hyde_

_Found this place to hide_

_Come seek me_

_Oh, so up and down _

_So back and forth _

_So insecure…_

_Can't get this taste out of my mouth _

_Swallow it down, pretend…_

_Hold it, hold it all in _

_Let it build up, oh build a bomb_

_And blow it, blow it away, _

_Clear it all out just end it_

She closed her eyes and played guitar when she felt someone watching her. She stopped immediately and looked in front her…nobody was there. She looked behind her and saw Tommy with a man she didn't recognize standing there and smiling. She put down her guitar and walked over to them. The man she didn't recognize gave her a weird look, and she realized she'd never changed from the vintage doors shirt, black pants, cons and studs she had been wearing earlier. It didn't bother her much.

"Kwest man, this is Jude Harrison"

"I can see why Tommy's been talking about you non-stop for the past week"

Tommy shot Kwest a glare, but Jude just blushed and smiled.

"He was talking about your uh---your talent! Yep, that wonderful talent thing you have goin' on"

"Thanks…Kwest right?"

"Yeah"

"Cool" The two smiled at each other. Tommy cleared his throat.

"So, girl. You ready?"

"More ready than ever"

The trio made their way into Studio B which was already all set up.

"Jude, why don't you play that song you were singing earlier, we could barely hear it…I want Kwest to hear what you've got"

"Actually, I want to sing another song for you guys…"

"Sure, whatever you feel like tonight"

She pushed hair out of her face and smiled. She couldn't believe she was sitting in a studio with producer Tom Quincy on the other side of the glass. She started to play and sing. Louder, with more feeling, with passion.

Sappy, pathetic little me 

_That was the girl I used to be_

_You had me on my knees…_

_I'd trade you places any day _

_I never thought you could be that way _

_But you look like me on Sunday…._

_Oh, you came in with the breeze_

_On Sunday mornin' _

_You sure have changed since yesterday_

_Without any warning_

_I thought I knew…_

_I thought I knew you… _

_I thought I knew you well…._

As she continued singing Kwest looked at Tommy in disbelief.

"Man, this girl can really sing"

"Glad you stayed man?"

"Chyeah! This girl is the real thing man, we need someone like her"

"She is, isn't she?" Kwest shook his head in disbelief and turned Jude up. "Tommy looked down at his fingers and sighed to himself as he watched the sixteen year old girl sing her heart out _She's even better than the real thing._


	6. Chapter 6

thanks for all the feedback everybody! It really does mean a lot to me!

I don't own Instant star or the songs I use unless an A/N is before it.

Jude gets a bit out of character later on, but well this is fanfiction, we do what we want.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The night continued on, and Jude, Kwest, and Tommy were having a blast. She had already recorded one song, Sunday Morning, and was starting on a song called 24 hours.

She walked into the booth took a deep breath and got her guitar, and started to play.

"Man, this girl is too much. Funny and talented? It's too good to be true" Kwest marveled.

"It is pretty amazing, huh? You think G would sign her?"

"Man, are you nuts? Of course she would, G's been dyin' to get talent like this for forever" Tommy smiled and looked at Jude who was singing the song he heard her sing the first time he ever heard her voice.

I can't have, anything I want 

_They say I'm just too young_

_But it's not my fault…_

_I'll find my own way home if I gotta, _

_I'll make it all alone…._

Tommy was bobbing his head, and his eyes widened when she went into upper register, belting.

_**I can't have anything I want, **_

_**They say I'm just too young**_

_**But it's not my fault…**_

_**I'll find my own way home if I gotta**_

_**I'll make it all alone…….**_

For 24 hours 

He sat back in awe and looked at Kwest who wore the same expression.

"Jude, that was great" Tommy said as she walked through the glass. She smiled and shrugged.

"Well, I try Quincy, I'm thirsty, where can I find a drink"

"Down the hall, to the left" Jude left and slowly made her way to the G-Major kitchen _this is just way too cool_.

"Man, I can see this already, you don't deserve to be Lil' Tommy Q"

"What's that supposed to mean, man!"

"Tommy man, you're totally falling for jailbait." Tommy scoffed and looked away.

"Pff, man please! She's SIXTEEN do I LOOK like a child molester!"

"Well, with the way you were just looking at her…"

"Kwest, I'm not that guy. I would never"

"Good, but if she was 21?"

"In a split second" They laughed and listened to the track…neither one of them aware Jude had just heard their entire conversation.

She didn't want them to know she'd been out there, so she made her way to the kitchen and called for help.

"Tommy! Kwest! SOMEBODY! I can't reach that mug at the top!"

Kwest came quickly into the kitchen, and got her the mug. "Better watch it Jude, you don't wanna bust a lung before you audition for G" he said as she filled the cup with water.

"For who?"

"Georgia…the owner of G-Major"

Jude spit the water out.

"What? That wasn't the deal…I just wanted to have some fun!"

"We know, but if she signs you, it'll be like this all the time"

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"Cool…well…we better get back to Tommy, right?"

"Yeah…" The two walked back to Studio B in comfortable silence. Tommy looked up and smiled.

"Jude, this is amazing, how did you NOT win Instant Star?"

Jude shrugged as she sat down, "I'm 'Too Avril'"

"Yeah right, you have talent, there's nothing Avril about that, or anything (cought) SADIE about that" (A/N Sorry if that offends anybody, it's just for the story)

Jude laughed and they listened to the track again.

Little did any of them know Sadie had come in to have Tommy hear her song. She looked in and saw him with Jude, and heard the rude comment Tommy made about her. Her eyes welled up and she ran out. _So he wants to play that game? Tom Quincy will wish he'd never been born after experiencing the bitch within. And how could Jude not stand up for me? I have the perfect idea…_

It was a shame she left so quickly, because Jude in face DID stick up for her.

"Ass! She's my sister, and she's a whole lot better, no thanks to you"

"Jeez chill, she's just not my type of music"

"At lease she has some vocal abilities Lil' Tommy Q" she snarled. Tommy was to say the last taken aback, but got over it. After about 8 minutes of silence Jude spoke up.

"So, what're you gonna do with these recordings?" she asked slyly even though she knew fully what he was planning on doing.

"Well, I'll probably make you a demo and give in to Georgia, I know her she'll love you and then you'll probably get signed to G-Major" He smiled at the expression on her face.

"Woah…that's pretty intense"

"Yeah, but I can feel it you were born to do this" Tommy sad.

Kwest coughed. "Sorry to ruin the moment, but do you have anything else you can record tonight?"

Jude snapped her head, " Uh…I do, but I'd need to get some backup"

"Like…" Kwest motioned for her to keep going.

"Well, I jam with this band the Spiederman Mind Explosion…"

"Are they any good?"

"Well we've just been working on stuff the past week or two, but I have a song that I've done with them…"

"Cool, what's it called?" Tommy asked

"Sixteen…I wrote it like three months ago right after my birthday. The look on Tommy's face was priceless and Kwest cracked up. He looked like someone had just hit him with a frying pan, and it seemed like he FINALLY understood that he was falling for a sixteen year old. The awkward silence was broken by Jude's phone. She took it out of her pocket and smiled.

"Speak of the devil, it's Speed!" she picked up the phone "Hey!"

Tommy looked at Kwest in horror, "Speed?" he mouthed to Kwest. Kwest suppressed laughing.

"What am I doing? Oh….not much"

Tommy's eyes bugged out of his head.

"Yeah, today was great" she tried to whisper but Tommy heard. His heart sank, but he mentally slapped himself for it doing so.

"I miss you so much too" This was getting to be too much for Kwest. _I wish I had a video camera…I think I'm gonna pee my pants_. He couldn't help laughing.

"Yeah, we definitely gotta do that more often" Tommy finally got up and walked across the room and sat on the couch. Kwest went into the soundproof booth, closed it and cracked up.

"What time? Well, it's 9 now…the show starts at 10? Guinness? Absolut? Jack Daniels? Hun, I'm totally there. Yeah, pick me up at like, 9:30, I'll be home. Kay Speed. Bye"

"Tommy I'm really sorry-wait, where's Kwest?"

Tommy motioned to inside the booth at Kwest who was on the ground laughing.

"What's his complex? Anyway, I'm really sorry Tommy but I have to get home. Speed's taking me to a show down at Hamilton"

Tommy looked up.

"I see…the café?" Jude shifted uncomfortably.

"Well…yeah. I can totally ask him about coming in to record that song I was telling you about. When's a good day?" He looked into her eyes, and he couldn't stay mad. Those huge doe eyes, how could he fall for her? He could never be with someone he couldn't stay mad at because their eyes were so gorgeous…could he?

"Sunday" he croaked. Jude smiled and his knees felt weak, but he didn't want to admit why. "I noticed you mentioned a bunch of alcohol involved with this guy….you sure it's safe? I mean, usually guys just want a girl to get drunk so that they can…you know. And I know how you think everybody's perfect and out to do the right thing" He was half joking, half not.

Jude looked up, slightly offended. Who was Tommy Q to tell her when she could and couldn't have a good time, and who she could hang out with!

" Please Speed is like…totally my guy" Tommy looked at her questioningly and she smiled evilly to herself. She noticed that Tommy had gotten frustrated when she was on the phone…the converstion with Kwest before….the night at his apartment. She suddenly felt herself flush, but figured she could play Tom Quincy, because after all, he deserved it, right? She was already fuming from what he had just said, but now all the anger she had been feeling towards everybody, him for saying what he just did and for what happened at his apartment, her father, for ruining everything, Sadie, for being herself…Jude felt herself just snap into someone totally different.

She leaned closer to him and whispered in his ear, "Speed is totally my fuck buddy, Tommy"

He pulled away and looked at her, eyes cold. " What happened to 'This was my first real kiss'"

"Well, I guess you can add acting to one of my many talents."

"You weren't acting that night"

"How do you know?"

"I just…know"

"Yeah, okay Tommy you keep telling that to yourself, trying to make yourself feel better for making out with a sixteen year old chick who probably gets more action than you do. Now, while you're doing that I'll be at a show with my boyfriend, getting smashed, and probably screwing him later"

Woah, where did that come from? I mean….the whole show with boyfriend getting drunk thing was right on, but screwing Speed? Well I guess Tommy's taking this pretty hard considering he looks like his dog just died.

"I uh…I have to get going" Jude stammered. Tommy was rooted to the spot still in shock that a sixteen year old just offended him. The same sixteen year old who he knew he was falling for. Jude got her back and ran, not before saying goodbye to Kwest, and a soft, grumbly "bye" to Tommy. She ran home, changed into something she knew Speed would like. Her ripped jeans with her black tanktop that showed off the right amount of cleavage. She fixed up her makeup and ran outside, just as he pulled in her driveway.

"Jude, you look great"

She leaned over and kissed him.

"Thanks"

They rode about 10 minutes into town and got a piece of pizza first. Speed noticed that there was something about Jude that was different. She was more flirty, more edgy, more he knew it sounded lame in his head but…punkish? She suddenly didn't seem to care about anything people said or thought about her. He admitted it to himself…he liked this Jude, a LOT.

They made their way over to the show, and listened to the metal band blare. They headbanged and sang along, taking a break every 15 minutes or so to get a drink. By 11:30 Jude was getting pretty hammered. She was all over Speed. They'd been making out for the past 10 minutes and she found herself feeling more liberated than ever when she forced him to put his hands on her. She didn't know what it was. But she liked it. She liked it a lot.

Xxxxxxxx

In the meantime, Tommy was having a total conniption. He'd been pacing and throwing things in the G-Major Studio for about an hour, because Kwest left. He was livid. How could she lie to him like that? For some reason, the idea of being her first kiss, made him feel so special…_she's lying, idiot. You were her first real kiss, you just pissed her off_ somebody in his head kept saying. He sat down to breathe when his cell phone rang. He picked up to hear a hysterical Sadie on the other end.

"T-Tommy, I need you help. I can't find Jude, she's not anywhere, not with these two dorks she hangs out with Kat and Jamie, I tried the SME houses, but she's not there, I don't know where else to go"

Tommy became even angrier. Leave it to her not to have TOLD anybody where she was going.

"Don't worry Sadie, I'll find her"

xxxxxxx

While Tommy made his way to his car and sped the half hour across town to find her, Jude and Speed found a room above the café and were going at it. He was on top of her on the bed. _Why's she acting like this? She's never been like this when she was drunk before…_He pulled away and she went to kiss him, but he got up.

"Jude, what's going on?" He sat on the edge of the bed.

"Whasgoinon?Whasna'goin'onSpeedyWeedyismorelikeit" She giggled and looked down, and he rolled his eyes. Something wasn't right, thank god he'd only stuck to one glass of beer that night.

"Jude, something's not right. Talk to me" He looked at her, eyes pleading, not that she could even see straight.

Jude cleared her throat and tried to get her words out.

"Dad affair, Sadie perrrfeeccctttttt stupid Tommy Tommy stupid" Speed looked at Jude. Who was Tommy? Why didn't he know him? Jude wasn't friends with any Tommy's in their school…

"Who's Tommy?"

"Doesn'matter" her words became slurred again "letshavemoreefunnn" she smiled and slung her leg over him, and kissed him. He couldn't help but give in as he felt this beautiful girl lower him onto the bed. They started making out again. Jude's hands started making their way up Speed's shirt to take it off. She was just about to when they were interrupted.

A livid Tom Quincy flew into the room picked Jude up and slung her over his shoulder.

Speed was beyond confused.

"Lil' Tommy Q?" _Tommy? She knows Tommy Q?_

Tommy rolled his eyes "Spiederman right? Glad to know the guys Jude's hanging out with get her drunk. I have to get her home, you know, where her FAMILY is worried that she's out being drugged and impregnated by some ass like you"

"What the hell!"

Jude was only half awake now. All the engery she had seemed to have just drained. She looked up at the bed and saw above it there was a cross. _Thassfunny, _she thought to herself.

Tommy brought her out to the car and set her down. She looked up, or attempted to and saw Tommy's face very close to hers. She pulled her head up and kissed him lightly. He pulled away, now fully disgusted with her. He shook his head. "Damnit, Jude, what the hell has gotten into you"

Jude just giggled looking up into the night. For some reason she saw a cross again, this time in her head, and murmured "_Bless me father, for I have sinned"_ and finally, passed out.


	7. Chapter 7

Blah blah Disclaimer, don't own anything the songs, the show, the people, etc

You're all awesome for R&Ring .

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Tommy swung Jude over his shoulder and brought her into her house. Sadie opened the door quietly and Tommy walked in and laid Jude on the couch.

"How did you know where she was?"

"I don't know…I just had a feeling?"

"Right….I know you're good, but you're not that good"

"Well, uhm, Sadie--"

Tommy was interrupted by a drunken Jude falling off of the couch.

"WHAT'S GOIN' ON?"

"Jude!" Sadie hissed, "Mom's sleeping, I know you're drunk just try and be quiet"

Jude giggled and stood up. She leaned against the coffee table and pushed herself onto the couch. She giggled and murmured.

" (Giggle) Hee heee SADIEEE ! You know Lil' Tommy Q? We went on a DATE Sadie (more giggling)"

Tommy's eyes widened and suddenly he saw in his head **Jude Harrison: Horny, Truthful Drunk**. His mouth hung open as he watched the two sisters.

"Uhm, maybe I should go…"

Sadie rolled her eyes before she got a chance to answer Jude.

"Do whatever you want Tommy, I'll see you at the studio tomorrow."

Tommy stepped outside the Harrison house into the warm night and let out a deep breath. _That was close….too close. It's time to tell Sadie. _He got in the viper and drove off.

(Back at the Harrison house…)

"Jude, what do you mean you and Tommy went on a date?" Sadie whispered as she laid her sister down on the couch.

" (Giggle) We went to (giggle) dinner and then (giggle) we went back to his place and (giggles)"

Sadie's heart raced and her eyes widened. Her producer deflowered her younger sister? She didn't even know what to think. Jude was too drunk to be lying now…

" But no no no (giggle)there's MOREEE" Jude's eyes widened as she moved up and looked at Sadie, her face suddenly serious and she leaned in closer to Sadie, "Daddy's having an AFFAIRRR!"

"Jude, you're drunk, shut up"

Jude attempted to get off the couch, but couldn't find her way around, she was seeing double. She suddenly got angry and started yelling.

" SADESSS COME BACK HEREEE! I SAW HIM HE WAS KISSING HERR AND LIKE, KISSINGGGG SADES! I SWEAR HE WAS KISSING HER SADES!" She felt hot tears against the back of her eyes, and collapsed onto the floor.

Sadie ran back into the room once she heard the thud of Jude falling to the floor. She was met by her parents who had been woken up by Jude's yelling and her fall.

"Sadie, what's going on?"

"She's drunk again"

"AGAIN? That's it, once she sobers up, she's going to a shrink, this girl needs help"

" Vic, is that really necessary, she probably went out with some friends and had too much fun!"

"Listen Stuart, getting drunk 5 out of the 7 days in a week is not FUN and she's going to DIE, now she's getting help"

"BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP, I'll help Jude, you two go back to bed"

The parents got up and turned only to be interrupted by Jude who groaned.

"Mommy?"

All the anger Victoria Harrison had toward her daughter diminished once she heard the childlike way her daughter called for her..

She sat by her side, and looked at Jude whose eyes were closed because she was getting ready to sleep.

"Yes honey"

"Oh Mommy you and Daddy need to stop fighting cuz then Daddy'll stop cheating on you"

"Excuse me?"

"He goes out to kissing and was dinner"

"Jude, honey, you aren't thinking straight" Vic looked back at Stuart who had suddenly paled and looked like he was going to pass out. Jude had fallen back asleep. Sadie came and picked her up, and put her on the couch.

"Stuart, what's going on?"

"Nothing Vic, let's just help her up to her room"

"Why is she saying these horrible things?"

"She's drunk, Vic"

Sadie stood back and watched her mother and father. They had been fighting horribly, but for her mom to find out her dad was cheating on her like this was unfair. She took a step back towards the kitchen.

"Stuart, tell me the truth"

"You already know it"

"Excuse me?"

"I'm so sorry Vic but…there's someone else"

Sadie closed the door to the kitchen as she heard her mother scream. Jude was out cold by now. Sadie just collapsed onto the floor and cried…and cried.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next day Jude arose with a very funny feeling in her stomach, and a massive headache. She saw Sadie sitting in the chair next to her. She groaned.

"Ugh, Sadie, what's going on, where're mom and dad?

"You don't remember anything?"

"About what?"

"Okay so that's a no"

Jude held her head and sat up, squinting from the sunlight that was beaming in through the window.

"Sadie, what happened last night?"

"To sum it up, you got drunk, Tommy brought you home, and you told mom that Dad was cheating on her, and were actually telling the truth, so right now they're at therapy and are probably going to get a divorce"

Jude opened her eyes widely, "WHAT!"

"Seriously Jude. It wasn't bad enough for you to steal my producer, now you have to and rip apart our family? What's wrong with you?" Sadie gave Jude a disgusted look and went outside slamming the door behind her. Jude heard her car start and pull out of the driveway.

_How did all of this happen? What was I thinking? Why didn't I tell them sooner? _

Jude got up, grabbed a pop tart and went upstairs, and started finishing up the song she had sung for speed. She drank some hot tea to ease her hangover…at least she wasn't throwing up this time. After some time she got frustrated and decided to take a break. She looked in the mirror _I think it's time for a change….a drastic change. _

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sadie, do you have anything to work on today?" Tommy groaned. He'd been at G-Major for hours and all Sadie had done was sit and say "yes" or "no". He knew that last night upset her, but something wasn't right. Sadie shook her head.

Tommy sighed. "Look, Sadie, what's up? Obviously something happened. I'm really sorry about last night and everything but maybe if you could just write it out or--"

"Do you really think I have no talent?"

"What? Sadie, if you didn't have talent you wouldn't be here" Tommy lied through his teeth. _Talent comes after good looks these days anyway. _

"Really? "Cuz that's not what I heard you telling Jude and Kwest last night."

"Sadie, what are you talking about"

"I came by, I wanted you to hear a song when I heard you saying how you thought there was nothing Sadie about Jude because she actually has talent. Maybe I should just get another producer"

"Sadie, I didn't mean it like that"

"Sure, whatever Tommy" The two sat in silence for a while.

"Actually Tom, there's a song I want you to hear…but I need to make a phone call first"

"Um, okay, why?'

"I need Jude for it"

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

_Perfect_ Jude thought to herself. She looked at her reflection and smiled at her newly died Ebony Black hair. It was temporary, but she just needed a change for a little bit. Her cell phone rang and she picked up. It was Sadie, and she wanted to play the song the two had written earlier in the week. Jude got ready and walked over to G-Major.

About a half hour later, Jude walked in the door guitar in hand.

"Um, hi, may I help you?" a short Asian woman asked her. She looked Jude up and down and rolled her eyes.

"Yeah…I'm here to see Sadie?"

"Why did she piss off your gang or something?"

Now it was Jude's turn to roll her eyes.

"Look lady, just because I'm wearing a Clash shirt with black hair, ripped jeans and combat boots doesn't mean I'm in a freakin' gang! Sadie's my sister, where is she?"

"Moody, much? She's down the hall in Studio B"

Jude walked into Studio B and was met with three surprised faces.

"What?"

"Jude…what in the HELL did you do to your head?"

"It's temporary Sadie, chill out"

"Thank god…"

Kwest was too shocked to speak, so Tommy spoke up.

"I kinda like it, it's really Joan Jett"

"YES! You get it!"

Tommy laughed, "Yeah, I get it girl, now can we get to work before we just waste more time?"

"It's up to the singer" Jude attempted to smile and looked at Sadie who was trying to smile as well, and she nodded. The two walked into the booth.

" Okay you two, when you're ready"

Jude started to play her guitar and felt her soul being poured into the song even if it wasn't hers.

She heard Sadie's voice fill the headphones meshing with the guitar.

**(A/N I kind of tweaked the lyrics)**

"It's not her fault that 

_She's so irresistible…_

_But all the damage she's caused_

_Isn't fixable…_

_Every 20 seconds you repeat her name_

_But when it comes to me…_

_You don't care_

_If I'm alive or dead so _

_Objection, I don't want to be the exception_

_To get a bit of your attention _

_You're in this for free_

_And I'm not your mother_

_But you don't even bother_

_Objection, the angles of this triangle_

_Got dizzy dancing tango_

_I'm falling apart in your hands again_

_No way, I've got to get away…_

_Next to her stupid guitar I look minimal _

_That's why in front of your eyes I'm invisible_

_But you gotta know small things also count_

_You better put your feet…on the ground, and see what it's about" _

Jude looked up. Next to her stupid guitar? Sadie couldn't be talking about her…could she? And what was up with the lyrics, the like completely changed. She was on a roll so she decided not to stop playing.

_Objection, I don't want to be the exception_

_To get a bit of your attention _

_You're in this for free_

_And I'm not your mother_

_But you don't even bother_

_Objection, the angles of this triangle_

_Got dizzy dancing tango_

_I'm falling apart in your hands again_

_No way, I've got to get away…_

I wish there was a chance for 

_You and me_

_I wish you couldn't find a place to be_

_Away from here…. _

_This is pathetic and sardonic_

_It's sadistic and psychotic_

_Tango is not for three was never meant to be_

_But you can try it, rehearse it, or train it like a horse_

_But don't you count on me_

_Oh don't you count on me boy!_

_Objection, I don't want to be the exception_

_To get a bit of your attention _

_You're in this for free_

_And I'm not your mother_

_But you don't even bother_

_Objection, the angles of this triangle_

_Got dizzy dancing tango_

_I'm falling apart in your hands again_

_No way, I've got to get away…" _

The two sisters looked at Tommy who was sitting in awe on the other side of the glass. He pushed a button that fed into the girls' headphones.

"That was freakin' amazing, Sadie, why don't you go take a break, I wanna go over some guitar stuff with Jude"

Sadie smiled but was stopped.

"Sades, how can you even think of a guy right now?"

"Jude I just called you here to work on this song. After that, please don't talk to me, I can't deal with your shit anymore"

Sadie walked out and left Studio B.

Tommy had left for a moment to get some coffee so Jude started playing her song.

_I started out on the wrong foot_

_Now I'm not myself_

I am Jekyll, I am Hyde 

_Found this place to hide_

_Come seek me_

_Oh, so up and down_

_So back and forth_

_So insecure_

_Can't get this taste out of my mouth_

_Swallow it down_

_Pretend_

_Hold it, hold it all in_

_Let it build up_

_Build a bomb_

_Blow it, blow it away_

_Clear it all out_

_Just end it_

_I'm just a normal person_

_Without those problems_

_When did it change?_

_Admissions so embarrassing_

_I'm on the verge of tears again_

_Hold it, hold it all in_

_Let it build up_

_Build a bomb_

_And blow it, blow it away_

_Clear it all out_

_Just end it_

_Oh look I took the Band-Aid off_

_Did I take it off too soon?_

_Hysterical confession_

_My big courageous move_

_Don't gasp at the predictable_

_A comforting lie can't last_

_Preordained checklist of this awkward love_

_It's so sad_

_Hold it, hold it all in_

_Let it build up_

_Oh, build a bomb_

_Blow it, blow it away_

_Clear it all out_

_Just end it_

_Sort it, sort it out_

_Just give it back_

_No thank you_

_Toss it, toss it away_

_Eliminate_

_Just give up_

_I can't decide_

_This tug of war_

_I'm feelin' weak… _

Tommy had walked in, in the middle of her song. _Why does everything this girl do turn to gold?_ He thought to himself. He watched as she started to cry, and knew something was up.

He walked inside.

"Rough night"

Jude looked up, surprised. "Wh-What? Yeah, you could say that….what happened last night anyway?"

"You just hooked up with Speed and I found you and brought you home…"

Jude looked away, slightly embarrassed.

"Oh"

"Yeah…"

"They split Tommy" She started to cry harder, and turned to face him.

"What?"

"My pa-parents…I told my mom about my dad while I was drunk and and oh god Tommy" She pulled him in and he held her as she sobbed into his chest, comforting her. _The song…comforting lie…it's for her father…._

They were so wrapped up in each other they didn't realize Sadie on the other side.

_Unbelievable. _She thought. _Un-be-fucking-lievable. _


End file.
